Through the many years of counseling and teaching, I have taught that forgiveness is the cure for the pains of life. I am not speaking of the physical pain of illness or injury, but the pain of the heart, soul, and spirit. It is that pain that comes from anger, bitterness, unfairness, injustice, and cruelty.

First, the cure of forgiveness comes from God, as we seek from Him the forgiveness for our sins. David said in Psalm 51:4a when he was seeking forgiveness, Against Thee, Thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in Thy sight: Second, the cure of forgiveness comes when we forgive and receive forgiveness from other people. Many well accept these biblical truths and go forward seeking the cure. However, often they will return saying, "I don’t feel forgiven" or "I forgave that person but I don’t feel any different." Then they will ask, "Did forgiveness really occur?"

The problem is not whether or not forgiveness was given or received but a misunderstanding of the process of forgiveness. Forgiveness is an act of the will. It is not based on feelings, but rather on faithful obedience to God’s commands. Forgiveness is the first step in the healing process. Like physical healing, the pain doesn’t immediately go away. But just because there is still pain doesn’t mean healing isn’t happening.

When I was young, I had to have surgery on both of my ankles. I had sprained them too many times playing basketball without letting them heal properly. After the surgery was over on the first ankle, it really began to hurt. For an entire month it continued to hurt, and I couldn’t even walk on it. However, the pain was not unexpected because the healing process takes time. Wouldn’t it have been foolish of me to call up the doctor and complain about the pain in my ankle? "Doctor, you didn’t heal me; my ankle feels worse now than it ever did."

Just like I needed to trust the doctor that what he did was going to work, we must trust in God’s way. God does not always heal instantly. Sometimes God uses the pain to teach us more about ourselves, to make us more like Christ. Sometimes God uses pain to remind us not to do that sin again, but God always uses the pain for our good.

So, if you doubt that God has forgiven you or that you have really forgiven another person because you don’t feel different, don’t trust in your feelings; trust in the truth of God’s Word. You have been forgiven and if you have given forgiveness to another, it did happen. Wait on the Lord and His healing process. God has promised you the peace that passes all understanding and it will come.

Todd Tjepkema, B.A.
Executive Assistant